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Absolutely Memorable ALN Members' Portraits!

"The Ideal"
These people are attractive and well-dressed, have a winning smile and present themselves confidently. We would hope that all singles photos are taken with this much care and self-awareness.
And what a dress, too!

"The Outfits and Hair Collection"
These people had simply divine (or memorably awful) 1980s outfits and hairstyles.
Cute, and what a dress!	What a jacket!	That hair!	Hands up if your aunt looked just like this in the '80s.
Dude's rockin' that sweater!	Sweater and -- man, take a shower before your photo shoot!

I didn't hide the identities of these people because I was sure they, ah... probably don't mind.

"Les Miserables"
"Just give me a natural look and we'll soon have you out of here. Just a little more dour. A little more... Perfect! <snap>"
the "your girlfriend's disapproving father" face	Wow.	Yikes!
(taken at the MAC21 offices, obv.)	OMG
the "disapproving Mr. Spock" face		"Can't wait to get back to the grain harvester."	Oh. My. God.

Clearly these three, er... own waterfront cement businesses, let's say.

- "No retakes, really?"
- "No retakes."
		Membership cost about $2,700 at the time, remember that, folks.

"That Psychotic Look"
This fine group knows just how to look straight into the camera and rattle any potential mate.
...	Ever watch Full Metal Jacket?	...	"I said 'make love to the camera', not 'skull-fuck it!'"
"Yeaarrrghh!"

"Too Small"
Next time can you ask the photographer to take 2 steps closer?
I know what's distracting you... and yes, it is the fact that it's way overexposed.		You know when you have to take your own picture by yourself, so you set up a camera on a tripod and sit on the sofa, but your coffee table gets in the way, and rather than move the coffee table aside, you decide to move the tripod back, just behind the table? This is the photo that you get.	I can't make out a thing, except that he's a pharmacist at the seaside.

"Bad Attitude"
These guys exude a certain something.
"Ladies, your wait is over. God's gift to women has just signed up for assistance in getting a date."	Smug	Douche	This is the unmistakable look that says,"Hey, I make too much in a year to be sitting here doing this."

Miscellaneous Amusing Characters - (21)
I swear, she was my co-worker back in Iwate.	Leona Helmsley in exile	"We've found Tokyo Rose! You can call off the search now."	It may look it, but I promise you, his head has not been Photoshopped.
"Pardon me, I have an opera to which I must soon return."	that defeated look	1970s Italian film actor	"Turn-offs include hall monitors and Calculus 12"
"Just came from the gym where I did 300 squat-thrusts."	"Remember, if rejected, I know how to wield this."	My grandpa dressed this way in the photos taken before I was born.	A word to the wise: don't use your police mugshot to pick up the ladies.
"Just walked away from a punch-up and into MAC21."	"Radio Station KUTY, D.J. Wolfman Jack at your service!"	C'mon, have a shower and shake off the hangover first!	I've nothing to say about this guy, but apparently he rates a seven.
"Oh, hi! You've caught me displaying how active I am."	I'm sorry to disappoint any ladies interested in this guy -- clearly, this is an obituary photo.	- "Aw, Mom, do I have to p-" - "YOU'RE POSING!"

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